Anupama Muthukrishnan, & Devarajan Nambakam PGP 2006
“It definitely helps to have similarity in priorities & thought process – that is the cornerstone of our relationship.”
How do you balance long work hours and a chaos free household?
This is an ongoing balance that we seek and we don’t believe there is any such thing as a perfect balance. Being well educated and qualified people, there is a deep rooted sense of ambition that underlies our thoughts for 1. personal careers/ambition 2. wealth and source of income/luxuries for our family and 3. right upbringing for our daughter.
As a family, the key for us is to constantly figure out what our combined priorities are and we try to make them work, as it is not possible to spend time on everything we want as much as we want.
How do you make sure that you spend time with your partner?
This is probably the hardest part. Your partner is also your friend and the one who is most likely to understand the challenges that the other faces. So we often end up taking it for granted. We constantly strive to make sure we don’t over-do it, but this is something that we have to consciously keep working on.
What are a couple of things that you appreciate about your relationship and why do these things seem significant?
There is a very strong understanding of each other’s respective strengths and weaknesses between us. And we also believe we are reasonably different but complementary personalities. That means while we can often think about things differently, it also means that we are able to complement each other when it comes to dealing with critical decisions and actions for our family.
How did you go about career growth and career planning “together”?
Both of us are in very different career streams and stage of careers. While Anupama is multi-faceted in her skill set and talents (being a classical dancer and singer) in addition to having a very successful career stint in investment banking and currently working with a group of friends in a similar field, Dev has remained true to his passion in investment banking and is still in the same role that he took in campus placements. We often discuss about what is best for each of us as a next step in career, but it always has an underlying understanding that our respective actions has to be for the benefit of the family and not just our individual selves.
Have you lived/living in different cities? If yes, how do you cope with family commitments/manage trying travel schedules?
We lived in different cities for a brief period of nine months before our marriage and after our engagement. It can be challenging to manage time zone difference, day-to-day workload and not being able to physically be there and understand each other. That was a phase which also taught us a lot on how to deal with relationships
Do work conflicts come home? How do you keep rivalry at bay?
Since we are in very different career streams currently, they don’t necessarily conflict with each other.
Please share any instance of compromises in career growth for the family. (One by husband & one by wife)
Anupama had a very successful stint of over three years in investment banking post campus with a global investment bank. When we decided to have a kid, she decided to give up that career at least temporarily in order to focus on family. There was no right or wrong decision and it was a personal choice, but something that Anupama did in the best interest of the family.
Dev has been fortunate so far that he has retained his role in his firm and his career continues there. However, one thing that he is very focused on is ensuring that he does his fair share for taking care and bringing up our daughter. Even if it means hard physical and mental workload, he is keen on ensuring that Anu and his daughter never feel that he focuses on career at the cost of family.
How does it help being in the same boat?
We feel we are in the same boat when it comes to how we think of ourselves as individuals and as a family. It definitely helps to have that similarity in priorities and thought process – that is the cornerstone of our relationship. We need to make sure we never end up taking this for granted and continue to appreciate that each of us brings something to this family which is what makes us whole.
